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Funnies

CSC 350

You can do this in a number of ways. IBM chose to do all of them. Why do you find that funny?

— D. Taylor, Computer Science 350

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Family Fluff Funnies

In case you thought I was kidding…

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Funnies

I Love Imgur

I love Imgur. I lurk and sometimes post, but I adore the stuff you can find. Here are some of the sweet, funny, and cool things I have found over the almost two years (Almost my second cake day!) I have lurked about.

This made me happy (Not mine)

Imgur Album Humans

This is why we DON’T MESS WITH THE BRITISH NAVY

That’s not even half. These are my favorites of my favorites from TWO PAGES. I’ll add more as I go along. 🙂 Have fun with these!

Categories
Jokes

Survey Says…

In the most recent survey of the dead:

  • 97% of respondents said that getting a vaccination was better than being dead;
  • 2% said that they weren’t sure which was worse;
  • 1% repeatedly asked the interviewer, “does this sheet make me look fat?”
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Jokes

Heaven vs Hell

Heaven is where the police are British, the chefs are French, the lovers are Italian, the mechanics are German and the trains are run by the Swiss.

In Hell, the police are German, the chefs are British, the French are the mechanics, the Swiss are the lovers and the trains are run by the Italians.

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Fluff Funnies Stuff

That was one angry duck…

I’m sitting in the living room, minding my own business, working from home (as you do), when I see a large bird land in the neighbor’s yard, followed by a male mallard duck. Being me, and curious, I checked and sure enough, the first bird was a female duck.

After they finished doing … whatever it is they were doing in the neighbor’s yard, she popped up on the fence and started quacking. Loudly. For a LONG time.

She was up there for a good two minutes, quacking angrily. And then she moved…

Yes. That’s my car. With an angry duck on it. She flew off along with Mr. Duck. You can almost hear the “Honey! Wait for me!”

Categories
Jokes

Fish Joke

Q: What do you call a fish with no eyes?

A: A fsh

Q: What do you call a fish wearing glasses?

A: A fiiiish

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Jokes

Halloweenie

Q: What is a ghost’s favorite thing to drink around the holidays?

A: Booze!

Categories
Funnies Linux

New Year’s Resolutions

12 New Year’s Resolutions
(Programmer’s Edition)

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Categories
Family Fluff Funnies

Best response ever

Us: We are going to the Bookstore! Do you guys want to come?
Children: NO! (They didn’t even look up from their computers.)
Us: If you’re sneaky, you may get to see your Christmas presents!
Beta: I don’t want to see them. If I do, they’ll turn into underwear!
Us:
Beta: I know that’s not true, but I don’t want to risk it.