Author: Mom

A terrible little story

Our teacher is a super hero. We found out by accident, when she destroyed the robot that tried to crush our school. We were very grateful that she saved our lives. We were less grateful that she saved the school. But, she’s a teacher, so we guess that means she needed to save her job. Even super heros need to eat.

Mr. Malone, the principle, didn’t see her change into a super hero. He’s kind of a jerk, so we didn’t tell him. After all, she doesn’t like him either.

You want to know what happened? Okay, I’ll tell you.

It was Wednesday. Ms. Goodhew was teaching us about polynomials (If you don’t know what a polynomial is, don’t worry; we don’t know, either). Ms. Goodhew is our math teacher. She smells like mothballs and old-lady mints. We are really nice to her, because she had a really bad year last year. Something about being locked in a closet for 6 hours. She doesn’t notice that we sneak out to buy sodas from the machine by the gym, and we stay quiet and pretend we’re learning something. Its a win-win!

We were all half asleep, waiting for the bell to ring, when we heard the first THOOM. It sounded pretty far away, like thunder. That wasn’t too wierd, but then it happened again, and again. And it was getting louder. Poor Ms. Goodhew just kept talking at the front of the room, while we all craned our necks to look out the window.

Miss Redwolf was with her class, outside. She teaches biology, and always drags her class outside on nice days. Sometimes she dresses up in her “Ceremony Clothes” with feathers in her hair and beaded mocasins. Those days are the best. Today she wore her normal teacher clothes, which was kind of a bummer. She looks really cool on Ceremony Clothes day. She was looking in the direction of the THOOMs, too, and then turned to get her class inside. We thought she was worried about rain.

The bell rang, and we all gathered our stuff and headed off to our next class. I had Miss Redwolf, and headed down to the biology labs. I didn’t run. Mr. Malone totally made that up. Anyway, when I got there, the rest of the class was getting settled, and Miss Redwolf was nowhere in sight. I got to my seat, happy that I wasn’t late. The THOOMs were getting really loud, now, so I was glad to be inside. Maybe we’d get to watch the thunderstorm!

Only one problem with that plan. It wasn’t a thunderstorm. It was a giant robot. Who ever heard of a giant robot attacking a school? That only happens in cheesy PBS cartoons! Well, now it washappening to us. The other girls started screaming. The only reason I didn’t was because I was too scared. Then Miss Redwolf showed up.

She was outside. Her hair was in her usual braids, but her normal teacher clothes were gone, and she was wearing some kind of crazy superhero outfit, complete with a mask. It was red and yellow. At least she didn’t have a cape. I knew it was her because she still had a feather in her hair. She jumped into the air, and started fighting the robot.

Watching our teacher fight a robot was so weird. Even wierder that she was winning! Every body else hid on the other side of the room. I ran to the window to watch. When I didn’t die immediately, some of the other kids came over to watch, too.

After a few minutes, the robot was in pieces on the ground. A hand here, a foot there. The head wound up in Wisconsin, I think, the news wasn’t too clear on that. Miss Redwolf disappeared, and then walked into our classroom wearing her normal teacher clothes. She still had the feather in her hair. She saw us, staring at the window, and froze for a second. We just got back to our seats and we all pretended that nothing had happened. We were used to covering for Ms. Goodhew, anyway.

Mr. Malone had a fit over it. Apparently one of the legs destroyed the football field. He started giving everyone detention, but since Miss Redwolf was the teacher on duty, nobody really minded. At least we didn’t have to sit through any more boring football games! After all, real men play rugby.

Devious little minds

First Act

Lights out at 8 tonight, so that the children’s heads aren’t spinning on their necks tomorrow. See? We actually like their teachers! All electronic devices were to be turned over before the cut off, so there would be no shenanigans.

I went upstairs to do the kiss-goodnight-thing, and there is Beta, all tucked into bed, looking absolutely adorable, and like butter wouldn’t melt in her mouth. Her DS was prominently left on our bed.

You can already see where this is going, right?

When I leaned over to kiss her goodnight, I put my hand on her bed. Just slightly under her pillow.

Which was where she’d stashed the iPad.

The look on her face when I pulled it out was priceless, as was her reaction of, “Oh, man, NOOOOOOO!!!!” and banging the bed with her fists in a fine expression of anger.

Queue 10 minutes of frustrated whining/screaming/etc. Not that this did her a lick of good, but hey. She’s tired. I’m thinking acting lessons may be in her future. Or the CIA.

But wait, there’s more

The second act begins with Beta singing “Let It Go” from Frozen at the top of her not inconsiderable lungs. And then coming downstairs to ask me to play it for her on my phone because it was stuck in her head.

It is not long before I figure out that she is hoping I’ll bring my phone upstairs, put the music on, and then leave the thing up there unattended so she can play with it. The air doesn’t get old in her oxygen tanks. Or mine, either. I put the song on, sure. And I pumped up the volume and left the phone at the bottom of the stairs, so she could hear it.

We think she’s asleep now. There was a little more singing, but no longer at the top of her lungs.

From now on – we search her bed. 🙂

Aquarium ho!

Beta has been begging to go to the Aquarium. So, we gathered up the Sleep Over girls, crated the dog, and headed out.
First, LUNCH!

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Alpha and Rho having lunch on the bench. There were no tables available.

Then, the Aquarium!

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The girls had a great time. I had a great time. Dad had a great time. We messed with our camera settings. We swapped kids (once without either of us realizing), and just generally had a blast. Did the gift shop, and escaped without buying anything. Still happy about the lack of new stuffed animals.

We stopped off at Quincy Market, and Beta picked up a pair of bracelets. After that back to the car. Which is when we saw this lovely lady:

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Yes, that’s a wild turkey. In Boston. On India Street. She’s a pretty ballsy bird.

All in all, a wonderful day.

Busy busy day

First, there was the BOING You’re Awake! thing at 4 AM. Not so fun. But I did get up early, cleaned the house, and then sent the kids and Dad off to Karate.

Only to have him run poor Beta home sick. She was fine an hour later (most of that hour was spent in the shower, but hey – what ever works), so she was on for:

THING THE FIRST: BETA’S PROMOTION!

Beta during the demo portion of the promotion
Beta during the demo portion of the promotion

Here she is during the demonstration of a shuto. Pretty cool stuff! She did great during the demos, broke her board, and was apparently well behaved during the rest of the ceremony.

At the end of the demo, they did a quick self-defense show. Beta giggled the whole time, but managed to knock Sensei Anthony off, and pretend to run. Not bad for an 80 pound kid!

They let me give her the new belt. She worked really hard for it, and we are very proud of her. She loved the weapons demonstrations, so I have a feeling she’ll be working her buns off so she can learn how to use those, too. I didn’t get to stay for the whole thing, because I had to go get ready for:

THING THE SECOND: ALPHA’S BIRTHDAY PARTY!

Alpha's Birthday Cake
Alpha’s Birthday Cake

All she wanted was to go play Laser Tag. So, being the awesome parents we are, we did just that. Got her two close friends together (along with a random brother, Beta, and two dads), and off they went into the Jungle at the MVP. Half an hour later, they all tumbled out, exhausted and smiling like loons. So, apparently laser tag is fun!

After that, there were games (two batches of tokens later), pizza and birthday cake. Alpha’s friend, Rho, is a real shark. I think she had over 400 tickets by the end of the party. The Mini-Scot didn’t have as many, but apparently he had a grand time watching other people play. His dad and I tried to get the Nook out of the key-hole game. Its still there if you want a go. 🙁

Rho’s present was a huge hit, as was the Mini-Scot’s.  Then came

THING THE THIRD: THE SLEEPOVER!

Alpha is sleeping over at Rho’s house tonight. God love her mother, she invited Beta along, too. We decided she might want her house to still be standing in the morning, so we told her Beta would stay home and watch The Lorax. So, Alpha went with Rho, and Beta came home with us and the Mini-Scot.

THING THE FOURTH: SKIPPER

The Mini-Scot and his family have a large pony of a dog of the Newfoundland type. He’s a moose, no other word for him. As we moms were standing at the window, watching the children get ready for a quick bike ride, Lady-Scot looks up and starts howling. I didn’t get the initial shot (which would have been the best one), but here is one that I did get (and yes, that is us giggling like loons in the background):

Alpha is eleven? When did this happen?

So, our darling Alpha Child is eleven years old today. We pretty much let her plan her day however she wanted it. Donna’s Donuts for breakfast. The Dover Tent Sale after that. And then to Strongwater Farm to pick up the clothes she needs for the show next week. A quick stop in the park, and then back home for the afternoon.

And that’s when the real fun started. See, we spent a couple of hours last night coming up with clues. Things like:

Once upon a time you kissed her, / Now its time to ask your sister.

or:

Look next to where you wash your faces / You’ll find something to take you places.

and so on. We had a blast, and I wrote the clues on cards, and then hid them all around the house.

Alpha found the nerf bow and arrow. Then she found the skateboard (what was I thinking?). And finally, she found the big one. The Bike. Its a black and orange Trek 3500, and is great for getting her around town, or light trails. Her eyes were like saucers, and Dad and I both got huge hugs. Then she was on the bike and riding off down the street.

I think she liked it.

And now, we’ve had her birthday dinner of hot dogs and Gramma’s Mac and Cheese, with s’mores for dessert. We’re all curled up in the living room, and watching Star Wars. A fantastic day, by any measure.

We love you, darling girl. You are amazing.

Visiting the USS Albacore

My earlier plan to hide under the bed not-withstanding, we decided to head out into the weather to do something fun today. What to do?

We could have gone to the Science Museum, or the Aquarium. We could have gone to see the Constitution and the Bunker Hill Memorial (on Breed’s Hill, but who’s keeping track). Nope. We have several submariners in the family, and there is a submarine open to the public in New Hampshire. Here we come, USS Albacore! wpid-DSC_0206.jpg

The guys running the museum are fantastic. They clearly like well-behaved kids. The girls were told they could touch everything, get into the bunks, and drive the boat (who, apparently will veer towards dives).

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And touch and drive and try out the bunks they did!wpid-DSC_0202.jpgwpid-DSC_0194.jpg

According to both Dad and the girls, this is a much better submarine to visit than the USS Nautilus. The guys working the museum agreed. “We don’t talk about that other boat down in Groton. We clearly have the better boat.” We happily spent well over half an hour poking around, trying out bunks, and getting into mischief in the galley. It was just a fantastic day over all.

And we accidentally visited Kittery, Maine. Not many places you can say you accidentally visited a state just by taking the wrong bridge…

I’m gonna hide under the covers

I made bacon and eggs for breakfast on our awesome cast iron griddle. It works wonderfully well, and the eggs are delicious.

I had an egg flow right over the side of the griddle. My stove is now covered in raw egg. I can’t clean it until the griddle cools enough for me to move it. sigh.

Not an auspicious start to the day.

My Dream App

So, you may know that I’m a knitter. And I’m addicted to my phone, tablet, etc. These things are largely compatible.

As a knitter, I print many patterns. Patterns from Ravelry. Patterns from Knitty (did you see that the new issue is up? YAY!). I think my pattern printing is responsible for at least one tree. And the only thing I really need the printouts for are the charts. Those lovely, complex lace charts. Set up, transitioning, number of repeats, all that can be found online, anytime. The charts must be printed so I can track what row I’m on. I usually use a highlighter, but any writing instrument will do in a pinch. And if I forget my chart? Forget any knitting until I get home. ARG!

There are many fine apps out there as row counters. That’s not what I want. I want an app that will display my chart, with the rows I’ve already done, highlighted. Just like my lovely paper chart, but less likely to be left at home.

So, I have the Android SDK, Java 7, and no real idea what I’m doing. This is going to be great. 🙂